Aunty Acid by Ged Backland for October 28, 2022

A few years ago I read an article that listed reasons they would have suspected you of witchcraft back when they had those trials. I was “guilty” of more than half of them.

They liked their cook-outs. I guess they had a lot at steak.

If Aunty is a witch, she might first be tested by water.

It was believed in some places and times that water would reject an unholy person, so their body would float high, while a blameless person would sink into the water. Have we ever seen her swimming or diving? As far back as I remember — No! So it must be a sign.

Also, have has she ever been pictured drinking water? No, she invariably drinks wine and hard liquor! Another sign!

Burn, Baby, Burn! With all that alcohol in her, it won’t take long. (—

Aunty’s spin on “If you remember the ’60’s, you weren’t really there”.

No one was burned at the stake. All but one were hung. One was crushed with rocks.

If I lived like I did in 1970, I would be arrested. Many of the things I did back then are not politically correct today (they went through being woke first) and a few are outright illegal now.

Today you get canceled

One of my ancestors was a court officer at the Salem witch trials.

I would’ve been burned at the stake just for reading constantly. . .

Aunty and a broomstick are like soup and sandwich.

You sounded boring. Must have bought beer on Sunday

The Malleus Maleficarum, the Hammer of Witches still exists today; it has taken on the form of social media. Social, or perhaps more accurately, “anti-social” media is now used to destroy someone who affronts, in many cases unintentionally. It is distressfully often you read of someone taking their life or the life of another over something which was posted on one media platform or another. There is no forgiveness, no grace; just a mob mentality self-imbued with a bizarre sense of self-righteousness. It saddens me.

I guess that you haven’t really lived then Aunty.

In the 1690s, they didn’t need a reason, just a rumor

Aren’t you glad they don’t do that anymore?

Remember it was the so called church folks who thought they were doing right. Just like today. Wrong then – wrong today. Twist minds.

Not True: In Salem, they were more likely to crush you under a pile of Rocks or drown you in the nearest Pond.

Firewood cannot be reused the way Rocks and Ponds can.

They Were a Cheap bunch of Misogynistic Bigots.