Ballard Street by Jerry Van Amerongen for January 10, 2021

Arnold, I don’t think I would sleep there tonight, if I were you.

Be careful, Arnold, Maggie is hard to convince.

You have to quit staying up all night.

There is a lot at stake here.

Hmmm, I haven’t seen Arnold around lately… and was that Maggie and Chet in Perry" s Pizza Parlor? Nah…

“It’s surprising how many things a stake through the heart will work on.”

Hugs ’n kisses….

Surely Maggie could perform a little mirror test before offing her nearest and dearest?

 

It’s true that seeing him in one wouldn’t totally prove his case, since we don’t know the veracity of the legend.

But coupled with his aplomb in being confronted with her plans…

and even given the time it would take to go upstairs and find her hand mirror…

it might give her cause to … um… reflect a little further, herself.

 

And besides… NOT seeing him in the mirror would certainly give a little more credence to her theory.

Stop sleeping all day and she might believe you.

What a shame. Maggie used to like it when he nibbled her neck.

Besides, what self respecting vampire would have a pocket protector and pens; a nerd vampire?

With the way he sucked the life out of their marriage, what else could he be? But as Susan said above, there are tests: reflection, sun light, cross, garlic, and holy water. And a divorce may be better than life in prison.

He’s no vampire but she’s batcrap crazy. :)

Just to be sure, honey.

“It was just a hickey! Will you let it go!?” ☺

Now, will you give me a divorce!

Impending heartache?

Only one way to prove it.. now lay back

Eternal life ain’t all bad.

That’s just what a vampire would say…get him!

“I asked for a hearty steak.”

Prove it ! If I run this stake through you chest, and you don’t die,I’ll believe it.

Only one way to find out. This should make for an interesting court case.

Better safe than sorry

He looks awfully calm for a man about to be impaled by a stake through the heart. Perhaps he just prefers to sleep in a coffin.

What if he utters the ‘Hour Mother’ prayer after claiming to be part of the UK’s bloody football umpire state building? Asking for too many bloody Mary’s makes Maggie react like a bloodhound.