Free Of Gluten, Free Of Thought, Part 11NOT my story
I work in a pizza place that has large open brick ovens where the customers can see all the pizzas being cooked. I have just sat a family at a table and the mother speaks up.
Customer: “No, no this won’t do. We’re far too close to the oven.”
Me: “Is it too hot, ma’am? I can move you a bit further away.”
Customer: “No, it’s the gluten! I am deathly allergic to gluten and if I am this close to the oven I’ll breathe in the gluten particles!”
Me: Not even attempting to engage with this level of stupid. “Okay, ma’am, we can move to you to this table here.”
Customer: “No, this is still too close! I need to be as far from the oven as possible. I’ll take that table there.”
Me: “That table is already occupied with diners, ma’am.”
Customer: “So? Move them!”
Me: “I can’t do that, ma’am. That is their table until they have finished their meal.”
Customer: “So you want me to die, is that it? You want me to die from the gluten!”
Me: “No, ma’am, that isn’t what I am saying. I just can’t move you to that table.”
Customer: “So then you want me to die. Got it. I’ll be writing about this on Yelp!”
At this point I call my supervisor over, as threats of a bad review are usually “mitigated” by management. I explain the situation, he silently mouths a “wow” and then engages with the customer.
Manager: “Ma’am, I assure you that no one is trying to kill you. However if your gluten allergy is as severe as you claim, then I am afraid we cannot help you. You would be best served by another establishment?”
Customer: “What?! You’re not even going to try to accommodate my medical needs?”
Manager: “We always strive to accommodate as many allergies as possible, ma’am, but if gluten waves being emitted from our oven in the back of the kitchen might kill you then I fear what all the other diners tearing into their pizzas literally all around us right now might be doing to you.”
a self absorbed world indeed. I think I’d definitely suggest she go elsewhere, why would anyone with such sensitivities get near a pizza parlor. "Excuse me mam, but you’ve got gluten all over your face and we’ve got to get you out of here, now.
Digital Frog 8 months ago
Dough!
Yakety Sax 8 months ago
Free Of Gluten, Free Of Thought, Part 11 NOT my story
I work in a pizza place that has large open brick ovens where the customers can see all the pizzas being cooked. I have just sat a family at a table and the mother speaks up.
Customer: “No, no this won’t do. We’re far too close to the oven.”
Me: “Is it too hot, ma’am? I can move you a bit further away.”
Customer: “No, it’s the gluten! I am deathly allergic to gluten and if I am this close to the oven I’ll breathe in the gluten particles!”
Me: Not even attempting to engage with this level of stupid. “Okay, ma’am, we can move to you to this table here.”
Customer: “No, this is still too close! I need to be as far from the oven as possible. I’ll take that table there.”
Me: “That table is already occupied with diners, ma’am.”
Customer: “So? Move them!”
Me: “I can’t do that, ma’am. That is their table until they have finished their meal.”
Customer: “So you want me to die, is that it? You want me to die from the gluten!”
Me: “No, ma’am, that isn’t what I am saying. I just can’t move you to that table.”
Customer: “So then you want me to die. Got it. I’ll be writing about this on Yelp!”
At this point I call my supervisor over, as threats of a bad review are usually “mitigated” by management. I explain the situation, he silently mouths a “wow” and then engages with the customer.
Manager: “Ma’am, I assure you that no one is trying to kill you. However if your gluten allergy is as severe as you claim, then I am afraid we cannot help you. You would be best served by another establishment?”
Customer: “What?! You’re not even going to try to accommodate my medical needs?”
Manager: “We always strive to accommodate as many allergies as possible, ma’am, but if gluten waves being emitted from our oven in the back of the kitchen might kill you then I fear what all the other diners tearing into their pizzas literally all around us right now might be doing to you.”
(Contd)
mokspr Premium Member 8 months ago
His self loathing must be horrible.
The Reader Premium Member 8 months ago
Time for a career change.
Frank Burns Eats Worms 8 months ago
You’ve gotta lay off the dough, boy.
P51Strega 8 months ago
He can usually roll with the punches. He was bread to rise to almost any occasion, but this news just beat the stuffing out of him.
cuzinron47 8 months ago
Oh, and you have a yeast infection.
mistercatworks 8 months ago
How’s that for a poke in the stomach?
norphos 8 months ago
Would that be like an autoimmune thing in him?
susanj77 8 months ago
a self absorbed world indeed. I think I’d definitely suggest she go elsewhere, why would anyone with such sensitivities get near a pizza parlor. "Excuse me mam, but you’ve got gluten all over your face and we’ve got to get you out of here, now.