Calvin and Hobbes by Bill Watterson for September 16, 2021

Maybe Roslyn should apply for a scholarship.

Spaceman Spiff would’ve handled this better.

Tough guy, that Calvin.

“I want my MOMMY!”

Keep calm, Calvin. She said ‘deadman’ not ‘deadkid’.

At this rate, Rosalyn might earn her degree before college.

He couldn’t make it. He needs to replace his retroencabulator module.

I was a natural at the dead man’s float. One time, they called 911!

Okay, with a name like “Dead Man’s Float”, I can’t exactly blame Calvin here. Seriously, it doesn’t really sound like a fun, inviting technique. Might as well tack on ‘of Doooom!’ to it while your at it….

Excellent deadpan humor Algolei I. Or should I say.. deadman humor.

Is that Susy in the pool

RE yesterday. I thought a rat tail was a hair style in the mid 80’s A thin string of hair down the back

I guess his death ray blaster wasn’t waterproof.

That shouldn’t be the first lesson! First you should learn how to wildly flail the feet and arms. Then comes the deadman float. It’s a natural progression.

Don’t worry, Calvin, the cold water will help preserve your organs for harvesting.

yes but now she’s a high price lawyer living in a big house and driving a fancy car.

Cement flippers.

When it was affordable enough that a summer job was enough. I remember those times.

When I was taught a deadman’s float, I floated under water. I never was very good at swimming.

What Calvin doesn’t realise is that for the insurance scam to work, mom would have to be involved.

Okay, not being harsh here, but really?! “Dead mans” float? How about the crocodile drift instead. Perhaps sailors nap?

When I was young I would lay face down in the water and release air until I sank to the bottom, then see how long I could stay there. I want my young lungs back…

Notice how wisely Roz stays out of the water?

Gonna be honest, I don’t blame Calvin here.

Well, I guess that’s KIND of a deadman’s float…

Tracer Bullet needs to investigate… Before the murder!

timing is everything

No Calvin, the “Dying Man’s Flail” will not work.

And Calvin is going to be my first test subject…

Gee, I dunno. “Deadman’s Float” should appeal to 6-year-olds, especially Calvin.

Well, can’t blame poor Calvin here.

Alternate names for a Deadman’s Float: Prone Float, or Jellyfish Float.

When I worked at Boy Scout camp in my teens, one of my jobs was teaching the “Non-Swimmers”; never took me more than 2 sessions to move them through “Beginner” and into “Swimmer”. I only ever met 3 kids I couldn’t teach to swim.

They were, of course, my sons. Fortunately, someone else did manage to teach them.

Of course, I never had to try teaching Calvin……..

1944 , a skinny 8 year old at a Summer Camp in East Waterford Maine couldn’t float if my life depended on it. But later learned how to tread water. Polio was a big time fear, & very grateful my folks sent me & my brothers to a 2 month summer camp for many years!

I thought that was Rosalyn.

Ah, the days when kids paid for their own college and could do so with a part-time job as a lifeguard.

I suggest water boarding.

That would mean a 10% increase in the baby sitting charges next time.