Calvin and Hobbes by Bill Watterson for July 13, 2022

Is one of the books Calvin is sitting on a theology book? Because he seems to be pulling this theory straight out of his…

You should be used to consequences by now, Calvin.

Will Calvin start a new religion with all the foods he doesn’t like?

We never could eat our chickens, but the eggs were delicious.

God can’t be a chicken. If he were, the Bible would surely have some long, protracted verses about Him crossing the proverbial Road.

I always thought this comic was just Calvin having another rant and insulting God, and it didn’t occur to me the joke was that they were eating chicken for dinner until TV Tropes pointed it out.

This is the problem with Pascal’s wager.

What will Cal eat, when God is a chicken?

Calvin wouldn’t be the first kid thrown out of Sunday School for asking too many questions. After all, looked at logically and rationally, Christian theology, especially, is completely nonsensical, and according to some, seven is the Age of Reason and moral responsibility…

“I fear one day I’ll meet God, he’ll sneeze, and I won’t know what to say.” —Ronnie Shakes

Which came first: God or Chicken?

Calvin is pointing out that God is whatever you imagine he/she/it/ to be.

Worse. God might be a MOTHER

Mothers are omniscient too…

Kentucky fried for eternity!

Calvin’s mom is just like mine was.

Any time I’d ask a question or make a statement at the table, her reply would be, “EAT!!”

OK, now you all know my secret.

But at least, she was a far better cook than Calvin’s mother!!

Chicken is about the only meat that my son will actually eat!

Don’t think you are heading in that direction, Calvin…….

If that’s true, then he’ll really be plucked.

I think there would be other children out there that would love to find out what the consequences of having chicken are, Calvin!

An eternal chicken?

You squeaking about chicken for dinner, Cal? I saved the dinner gripes for real culinary catastrophes. Eggplant, liver, crud like that.

My grandmother chopped off a chicken’s head and the rest of the chicken jumped over the barn.

Send Calvin over to the Fox’s house for dinner. I doubt Andi’s eggplant or tofu surprise has much relationship with God.

A new Calvinist religion?

Calvin is a Hindu.

Consequences schmonsequences…

A loving God will forgive you. A vengeful God will send you to perdition no matter your actions. Pick your deity before dining.

What if you were in He!! and you were mad at someone. Where would you tell them to go?

Calvin, you will continue to be a fox in the henhouse.

Could we posit then, that Col. Sanders would be roasting eternally?

Which came first, this or the Far Side cartoon of Colonel Sanders at the Pearly Gates?

He’s a chicken, I tell you, a giant chicken!

It’s a pity that the double-meaning of “chicken” doesn’t translate. Readers in other languages won’t get the surprise when it turns out, in panel 2, that Calvin means a literal chicken.

Then he doesn’t smite you, the big Chicken. :)

And what will happen to those poor Chik-Fil-A cows?!

I like the tongue in cheek explanation we got on Lucifer about how chicken is God’s favorite food.

Dad seems to be considering the question

Chickens will kill and eat other chickens

sounds like something I would’ve said

Have to admit, Calvin is inventive, if not persuasive.

Can’t say I have ever been critical of Bill Watterson, but today’s strip did not make much sense at first. Maybe if they were shown eating from a KFC bucket of fried chicken then the joke would have been more obvious.

Not to worry, Calvin. The Good Lord will be breaded and covered in tomato sauce and mozzarella and then placed on a bed of Flying Spaghetti.

I’m pretty sure he meant to say eternal dam!ation

Heh, this is the only time where we’ve seen Calvin have to sit on books to reach the dinner table.

Could have been slightly more obvious that they’re eating chicken, but I guess a good joke is one where you can put two and two together.

If He’s a big chicken, you ought to be able to scare him away easily enough.

I know Calvin is odd….but I’ve never seen a kid that didn’t like chicken.

Is that dad’s left ear I see there?

Today’s strip isn’t the only time when Calvin has considered chicken’s revenge.

https://www.gocomics.com/calvinandhobbes/2015/01/09

I myself don’t understand kids being picky eaters. I suppose I was just raised not to be; you either ate what you were given or didn’t eat at all. My sister however has that problem with her own children.

Don’t worry about eternal consequences… my consequences for you are here and now.

What if there is a god that is corn or what if the Green Man (yes, google it) is god. Stop worrying Calvin, there is no god and if you wanted to please all the gods humans have invented you’d go insane. And remember, monotheism is only one god away from atheism.

That would explain why taking the Lord’s name in vain is considered fowl language.

The Intergalactic Church of the Cosmic Chikenhood.