Close to Home by John McPherson for November 09, 2020

I really don’t believe that will works doofus.

Said no one ever

Still gotta get past the guy with a pet falcon. (Wrong direction for a homing pigeon anyway.) Bleeb, you’re gonna get pooped on!

How much do you trust the local hawks?

Hey, Maybe as reliable as the postal service under Trump.

Just keep an eye out for the Perigrine falcon, they love pigeons, then there goes your vote, uncounted.

Depends on the voting machine. I don’t trust electronic machines with no paper backup. THOSE are an invitation to fraud. I DO trust the USPS, and will trust it even more with DeJoy gone and a president who actually supports this vital service (NOT a for-profit business).

Why not? Drones, bike messengers, email and smoke signals should be allowed, too.

I have never heard so much whining about voting since the Florida “hanging chad” debacle. One thing about Trump, he is showing us pretty much all the weak points in our Democracy.

Bleeb be chillin’ with the Bird guy…

I just threw my mail-in ballot in a dumpster in Kentucky and hoped someone would find it…

“Yo Larry, I didn’t know you kept a pigeon house up here! Whaddya feed ‘em?”

“Oh grains and bugs, mostly.”

“Cool! Is that bug sitting underneath the pen one of the ones you feed ‘em?”

“That yellow one…nah… they won’t eat those for some reason. But I’ve seen those yellow bugs do cool tricks like ride motorcycles, jump swimming pools, and swing from ropes and stuff, and… oop, never mind, I guess I’m wrong… one of the pigeons just ate it!”

“So Mikey, do you think pigeons taste like chicken… and if they do… why doesn’t a chicken taste like a pigeon?”

“It’s a mystery, Larry… we may never know! What’s that smell?!”

Not a bad idea for next election

Bleeb’s just chillin’. I think he’s worn out from his escapades over the weekend.

He’s wearing the wrong hat.

Good thing he lives in the big city or his vote may get shot down.

Your pigeon is wasting his time. Even if he delivers the vote Trump will call it fraud and will probably mock him for the way his wings flap like he did with Kovaleski.

I don’t trust anyone counting the votes anymore. Since, they don’t count all the votes and rig the software to where the person you voted for goes to the other person.

But that one is a stool pigeon.