Close to Home by John McPherson for March 20, 2021

Yeah, it’s easy to lose weight when your burgers and beers are sent online.

A virtual delight! Pandemic and lockdowns make even mundane things like work picnics seem appealing

On the plus side, Zoom has enabled me to have family gatherings (we are far flung across the country) more often.

Now, if a “smell ‘o sensor” could just be invented where the participants are able to smell the hamburgers. That would be so cool.

That volleyball game is going to be a toughie.

You have to supply your own beer and food? I’m not going!

The pandemic made zoom a phenomena. I wonder what will happen when people “discover” that Zoom is recording and selling their metadata, or whatever, like Google does. (just speculating)

LOST weight? During a pandemic? I’m impressed!

Your boss, Mr. Moneypinch, has noticed that you had extra money to build a shed, and money for meat and beer. Not a good look for a hard working employee.

here in Ohio at the end of March anyone 16 years of age and older can get the vaccine. hopefully that means plenty physical get togethers, no more zoom, starting at the end of Spring, early Summer…WOO-HOO!

And nobody to scrounge my beer.

ALEXA… dim the lights and activate my Thought Combobulator!

ACTIVATED!

Okay, I’ve got my coffee, the combobulator’s on, so ALEXA can use it to read and organize my thoughts without me having to type them in the comment section. Let’s see what knuckleheadedness is going on in Close To Home….

Hmmm, okay… Zoom company picnic… that’s actually pretty funny! I wish I could do that with my stupid family reunions. A Zoom reunion might be the answer to the idiots on my mothers side of the family! There’s Bleeb, but I don’t see Dalcon anywhere. Just once I’d like to see Dalcon catch Bleeb and see what happens. I dunno… maybe Bleeb opens up a can o’ whoop@$$ on Dalcon.

Anyway… so now I just need to add sump’n funny and edit-out any snarky, embarrassing remarks before I tell ALEXA to click send and …. HOLY SHEEPSFOOT!!!… they’re already in the comment section!

ALEXA! You weren’t supposed to send my thoughts before I edited them! What the heck happened!

I DEFINITELY HEARD “ALEXA CLICK SEND”, AND YOUR COMMENTS WERE SENT AS INSTRUCTED. YOU’RE WELCOME.

What’s the name of the new little guy with one eye and horns? He showed up again a few days ago and I’ve been wracking my brains trying to remember his name. Arcor or Argar or something.

It was Kalamajareenam

Only 6 per screen?

I guess Bleeb must be hungry so he’s waiting around for a burger to fall his way.

Oh, how we all wish we bought ZOOM stock last February.

Pass that burger through the screen please lol

Careful Bleeb, don’t make an ash of yourself.

Bleeb, you are gonna love volleyball!!!!!!!!!!! THWACK!!!!!!!!!!!!! :)

Wait there Bleeb- he might drop something.