Close to Home by John McPherson for December 08, 2022

Read the name of the store you two.

What did you expect in Santa’s chain stores? Toys?

And really sad sacks at that.

Looking for a sack for my sax

Absolutely. What part of “sacks” did you not understand?

I like stores that keep it basic. Easier to decide on what to get.

Don’t go to Dicks Sporting Goods.

They’re allowed to take handbags into Sacks?

Sack it to me.

They had a visionary middle manager who wanted to expand the line; they sacked him.

Pro Health Tip: If it’s allergy season, and you’re sneezing a lot, carry a handkerchief soaked in chloroform. So when you sneeze, you can adequately cover your sneezes, and you can also catch up on that sleep you’ve been needing.

Ugh! Some name brands are as ugly as they come but people who live by the name will buy them anyways…dumb

And you have to bring your own fifth.

You can put a lotta fifths in those sacks, lady.

Just Sacks!

Not to be confused with Sacs Fifth Avenue.

Lemme see, knapsacks, lunch sacks, tote sacks, burlap sacks…

If you want to be pedantic about the name, Im guessing they also sell the eponymous candy bars?

Those sacks sure look like Depends.

At $1200 a pop.

Do they have an in-store commissary that sells nothing but sack lunches?

If prices go up much more, sacks are what I’ll be wearing.

I’m disappointed in “Dollar tree” for obvious reasons

How would the bags be used? Just asking.

They don’t even sell anything to put in the sacks.

Second floor is violins.

You were expecting…a strip club?

Yup! If you want clothes, then go to Saks.

That place just sacks!

What’s a sack?