Agnes by Tony Cochran for July 22, 2013

I haven’t seen Lester since she bargained with the vet, a long time ago, to get him back at a huge discount, after she’d forgotten for months to pick him up.

His best trick must be staying alive when no one remembers his existence.

You have to admit that’s a pretty good trick. As for the more conventional ones, I’m afraid Lester is a failure. Like the pet rocks, he is good at staying.

HEY! I represent that! ;-)

It would be more of a trick if I could do my business.

I have to wonder what Agnes would be like if she didn’t have such a gloomy caretaker.

Agreed. Poor Lester – the world’s oldest living dog. Or at least he looks like the oldest dog. ...that Should win a prize.

Is it a better trick for the dog to lick its own business, or someone else’s?

Cleaned up joke:Q… Why does a dog lick his business?A,,, .Because he can.-Admittedly I only changed one word, so you might say I dropped the ball on that one.

Robin Williams once said that if he could do that, he would never leave the house.

A couple of guys were sitting around the house drinking beer. One guy’s dog was laying on the floor licking his “business”. The other guy said “I wish i could do that.” The dog’s owner said, “He would probably let you.”