Phoebe and Her Unicorn by Dana Simpson for May 03, 2018

Guilty of being innocent of being Jack Sparrow!

I plead “what of it?”

She could plead “no contest,” but given how competitive she can be, she’d try to contest it.

I cannot confirm or deny.

I plead “this is a waste of time, can I go now?”

Is anyone else remembering “Night Court” during this sequence?

I like Phoebe. This could be an interesting case.

I think “so” is a very appropriate plea. Well thought out little one.

This shows the difference between Phoebe and Calvin. Calvin is far less defensive of humanity and finds many things about human nature to complain about. Eg “I wish I had more friends but people are such jerks.”

Pheebs is already a better lawyer than Giuliani (though, ad mutedly, that’s a pretty low bar).

Another possible plea, albeit unbecoming of Phoebe: “No s***.”

Dana’s Unicorn Court looks more like English jurisprudence than American.

Nice comeback. She could be her own lawyer.

She’s got guts, that’s for sure. Being the only non-unicorn, non-magical being in the room, and giving an answer with sass.