Bound and Gagged by Dana Summers for September 12, 2018

What, did he get stuck with the bar bill and needs some cash?

at the inventor’s convention: “is there a patent in the house?”

And you might be Doctor Who?

Better hope not; doctors make the worst patients.

There is a lawyer’s convention in the auditorium next door.

Quick, somebody shout, “You try my patients!”

And bring your insurance card and ID

At my physical therapy clinic there’s a sign that says “Patient Check-in.” I rushed over and said, “I’m in a hurry. Where’s the ‘Impatient Check-in’ desk?”