Frank and Ernest by Thaves for September 01, 2021

Ain’t it the truth.

… If you wish to continue to hold, please press 1 to listen to screeching electronic music; press 2 to hear our Robo-Operator remind you that you are on hold; press 3 to reach a non-native language speaking customer agent for a small nominal fee of $250; press 5 to hear these options again for a small nominal fee of $500; … press 8 to reach a customer agent who can speak and understand your language but has no idea what our business offers for a small non-refundable fee of $1500.

Truer words were never spoken.

Due to our heavy call volume = we aren’t going to hire enough people to answer our phones in any reasonable amount of time.

Your call may be monitored for training purposes… or a cheap laugh.

Recent: “We’re sorry. Due to circumstances beyond our control, we are unable to answer your call.”. Hmmm.

“Don’t leave me ‘Hanging on the Telephone’”.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=emy5mA8Ixtc

I think I start using that on all calls.

Your call is important, but our profits are more important.

yeah, that sounds about right.

Hold time when you call the IRS is 90+ minutes, one time I was on hold for 2 1/2 hours only to be cut off. They have very soothing music that can ut you to sleep. It takes them 60 days to open a letter. They also charge 12%+ interest.

my bank Wells Fargo – when I complained about 1 lane open in an 8 lane drive up(you have to make a special appointment up to 3 or 4 days in advance to get inside) – the teller told me IF I didn’t want to wait then I should do my banking online or by machine. my complaint “I can’t use the machine OR online due to some security and transfer issues and would sure like it if they could have more than 1 teller handling the drive up so that you have to wait in the line for over 20 to 30 minutes”not only are they a joke but they don’t listen or care. oh, and they closed two of the branches in town because “covid” why not transfer? I am in the process of doing so – just thought I’d give WELLS FARGO BANK a HUGE PLUG for the POOREST service on earth – been using them for 21 years and since covid they have gone out of their way to fire the better tellers and personal bankers AND downgrade their customer service to “you’re our customer do what WE say!”

Waste of time

Your call is important to us, please hold until it’s not

For my money, the worst is, “Due to unusually high call volume…”

Liar

I was doing a point of sale installation as a subcontractor at $$$ per hour. Chicago had me on hold for eight hours. Most money I made for least effort.

Sometimes you’ll get that hold message when they’ve already closed for the day.

“Our call center is open Monday through Friday from 8 am to 5 pm India Standard Time.”

“Please continue to hold, your money is important to us,” truth in customer service.

I needed to talk to a credit card company and the static was so bad I could hardly understand the person. Funny thing, she had to put me on hold 3 times and the hold music was perfectly clear.

So very true.

…but your reason for calling is not.

Or, they say “Your time is important to us.” And then request a return phone call number and then don’t return the call. Ever.