Frank and Ernest by Thaves for October 13, 2021

I’m saving this one for Jason. You there, Jason?

In the woods.

Well I heard he was a bear and he had a lot of hair.

That’s cryptozoology, fake animals and where they don’t live!

It’s kind of a trick question – He wuz and yet he wuzn’t.

“’E’s a daisy, ’e’s a ducky, ’e’s a lamb!

’E’s a injia-rubber idiot on the spree,

’E’s the on’y thing that doesn’t give a damn

For a Regiment o’ British Infantree!

So ’ere’s to you, Fuzzy-Wuzzy, at your ’ome in the Soudan;

You’re a pore benighted ’eathen but a first-class fighting man…."

— Rudyard Kipling, “Fuzzy-Wuzzy,” 1892

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fuzzy-Wuzzy

A: “liddle lamzy divy”…

He was a bare bear.

I put down “Chair”

My son was a Zoology major – his third major in 4 years at UW-Madison. He just had to take a couple extra classes and all the other classes overlapped with his other two pre-med majors (Biology and Microbiology & Immunology).

Fuzzy Wuzzy was a bear,Fuzzy Wuzzy had no hair,Fuzzy Wuzzy wasn’t really fuzzy,Was he?

Fuzzy Wuzzy was a bearFuzzy Wuzzy had no hairFuzzy Wuzzy wasn’t fuzzyNo, by gosh, he wasn’t, was he?

Silly Willy was a wormSilly Willy wouldn’t squirmSilly Willy wasn’t sillyNo, by gosh, he wasn’t really

Iddy Biddy was a mouseIddy Biddy had no spouseIddy Biddy wasn’t prettyOh, by gosh, it was a pity

Fuzzy Wuzzy was a bearFuzzy Wuzzy had no hairFuzzy Wuzzy wasn’t fuzzyNo, by god, he wasn’t, was he?

Before or after his visit to the barber chair.

Mairsey dotes.

There was also a question about woodchucks. The Peter Piper question is in both botany and arithmetic.

Unanswerable without further information. The poem tells us that he had no hair, but from that you can’t conclusively determine that he wasn’t fuzzy. First, it could be argued that he definitely was Fuzzy, since that’s part of his name; second, he might be in a state of confusion, so he could rightfully be described as fuzzy; third, perhaps the test included a blurry, or fuzzy, picture of him; finally, if he is making a weak argument, he could be described as using fuzzy logic. (I’m sure I haven’t exhausted all the possibilities.)