Cornered by Mike Baldwin for August 26, 2010

There aren’t enough good-news stories to go around.

Which sells more papers? “10,000 airplanes land safely” or “One plane crashes!”

there’s your answer.

Coups and Quakes, baby, Coups and Quakes!

Senator has Affair One Legged Woman Murders Husband Deficit three times Bigger than Budget Non-Combat Troops Kill 30 GM Brings out In-Dash text Phone GM Recalls in Dash Text Phone\ Company lays off 400. Government says Unemployment Down.

Those are the headlines above the fold that sell papers.

Are you going to buy a paper that screams, “Cute little kitten reunited with Grandmother”?

It’s good news week Someone dropped a bomb somewhere contaminating all the air……

Which South American newspaper has been told to quit running bloody photos?

This must be a newspaper stand in New York city!

Put stories about penguins on the front page. Everybody loves stories about penguins.

Churchy La Femme: “Owl, I got a great story for your newspaper! My Pa seen a cat once!”

Howland Owl: “What’s news about that? Ever’body seen a cat.”

Churchy: “Actually, this cat was more of a rhinoceros.”

Howland: “Why didn’t you say so in the first place?!? Lessee, how you spells ‘rhinoceros’? R…I…N…N… uh, R…H…N…C… Stop the press! Churchy got a great story about a CAT for Page One!”

Runs with Beer, I remember that song and love it, but as I recall,

*It’s good news week! Someone’s dropped a bomb somewhere, contaminating atmosphere and blackening the sky.*

Valid point, though. :-D

fritzoid, LOL.

Beats me!