Frazz by Jef Mallett for April 12, 2019

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    Earthling Premium Member over 5 years ago

    I should name my dog “Everything” so I can say I know everything.

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    SonicFan91  over 5 years ago

    ok

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    M2MM  over 5 years ago

    Twain was brilliant, witty, and a very unhappy man.

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    Jeff0811  over 5 years ago

    Any teacher, or comic creator for that matter, that quotes Mark Twain is alright in my book.

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    LadyPeterW  over 5 years ago

    I named my dog “Five Miles”, that way I can say I walk Five Miles every day…

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    e.groves  over 5 years ago

    How can you know what you don’t know? I don’t know everything, but what I don’t know, ain’t worth knowing.

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    nosirrom  over 5 years ago

    I should name my dog “Pussy” That way I could say “Every day I get to pet….”

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    sandpiper  over 5 years ago

    Somebody HAD to bring the level down. Your turn.

    And knowing what you don’t know is fairly straightforward. Anytime someone asks you a question you can’t answer. You won’t keep a log of the questions, but you will remember there were lots of times you had no answer.

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    comicboyz  over 5 years ago

    From Rumsfeld’s Rules: There are things we know that we know. There are known unknowns. That is to say there are things that we now know we don’t know. But there are also unknown unknowns. There are things we do not know we don’t know.

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    rugeirn  over 5 years ago
    I briefly knew Rumsfeld in person. He was a complete waste of terrestrial oxygen.
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    MichaelHelwig  over 5 years ago

    If you just make stuff up, who is going to believe you?

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    Fido (aka Felix Rex)  over 5 years ago

    I use this technique — a student asks me something, I give an answer (unless it’s a genuine part of an assignment). If they come back later with a different answer, I tell them that I said what I said on purpose so they would do their own research (a “teachable moment”). The key part is sounding like your “guess” isn’t a guess at all. Say it with confidence, conviction, and certainty. “Yes the best way to get to Dodger Stadium is to take the 710 Freeway.”

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    COL Crash  over 5 years ago

    Mr Uhrmann is one wise dude.

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    Klepsis  over 5 years ago

    I only know all the odd numbered things.

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    StevenHCarter  over 5 years ago

    https://newrepublic.com/minutes/126677/it-aint-dont-know-gets-trouble-must-big-short-opens-fake-mark-twain-quote

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    braindead Premium Member over 5 years ago

    OBAMA IS COMING TO TAKE YOUR GUNS!

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    James Gifford Premium Member over 5 years ago

    Bzzt. Josh Billings, not Twain.

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    Bill The Nuke  over 5 years ago

    Someone is bound to reply that Mark Twain never said that

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    Night-Gaunt49[Bozo is Boffo]  over 5 years ago

    Frazz12 hrs ·

    I grew up in a family of musicians and became a cartoonist, and I still don’t know the answer to this crucial question: How does music theory manage not to kill the magic of music, while trying to analyze humor is one of the most boring and unfunny pursuits possible? Even the word “humor” makes me cringe a little, an indication of incoming buzzkill.

    But it’s gotta be done, or at least I can’t help doing it once in a while. And right now I’m going to analyze the special form of humor — which is what I think it is — we call bullshit, the deliberate application of that which we know to be false where that falsehood is useful. If laughter is medicine, bullshit is a drug. We abbreviate it BS, but we should really call it Bx. Like any other drug, Bx’s effects depend on the dose. And the dosage unit is awareness. If you’re aware of my Bx and I’m aware of my Bx, that’s therapeutic and fun. If I’m aware of my Bx and you’re not, it’s less fun and less therapeutic, but still maybe OK, if obnoxious, if I intend to let you in on the gag eventually. Cross over into unilateral Bx for gain, and now we’re lying and we’ve crossed over from recreational drug to dope. But the real danger is when you ramp up the dose so high that you yourself are unaware of your own Bx. That’s overdose level.

    Fortunately, that’s also the level where everybody else can start recognizing it again, so there’s hope. Not a lot of hope. There’s a Bx antagonist just as we have opioid blockers. But it saves the victim at the cost of killing the high, and the victims tend not to appreciate it at the time. And it’s a low-percentage gambit if the victim is too far gone, and it only works in the hands of the highly skilled rescuer, applied with surgical precision. It is the highly aware counterjoke. Call it …

    Narc Twain.

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