Fred Basset by Alex Graham for June 14, 2020

Rise of the machines, Fred.

Cutting back on hiring humans like they used to. Cheaper that way.

People used to have jobs answering phones. Now the system does all the ignoring of your call.

Your call is really important to us ( then answer the #××*# phone )

Now, many of them take up at least a minute reminding you they are trying to protect their employees because of the Covid 19. Just get on with it!

Please wait for our next available Human ! In the mean time don’t you like this maze we designed just for you !

Fred nailed it

And when a human does answer, they’ll ask you all the same questions you answered in the phone bush.

one word Fred – home. that’s it. they’ve all gone ‘home’. but if you leave your number they will call you back as soon as they come back to work. zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

The people are in the break room.. You are on hold to, a) force you listen to several commercials, b) suggest you find your own solution by going to the website where they get reimbursed for clicks, and c) filter out frivolous complaints.

The worst company to call is ATT!

They’re in quarantine Fred!

Ask Alexa, Fred.

Phone Trees are really annoying.

Aren’t you shocked when you actually get to speak to a real person?

That is the God’s honest truth. I despise those things almost as much as having to press 1 for English.