Gil Thorp by Henry Barajas and Rachel Merrill for November 30, 2021

… presuming they don’t play Canadian football there instead. (Which I expect they do.)

“The very first game of modern football was played between Harvard and McGill in 1874. The rules evolved throughout the game.”

Sounds like Calvinball.

I went to McGill and certainly knew no one who played football though they had a team (I guess it would be CFL rules? I know nothing about football lol)

Bon voyage, Chance. Time for Senior Day and then Hoops!

P4 “The good news is that I can drive there. The bad news is I need to learn to speak Canadian.”

With Chances decision, this seemingly friendly nod to our fellow snarkers…errrr…readers north of the boarder, Both French and English speaking Canadians have unwittingly become assimilated into the fabric of Gil Thorp, Twilight Zone

BWAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAA

Blank stares all around. “Huh?” “What?” “Did he say ‘McGill’?” “McGill?…”

Then in unison: “Oh, you mean ‘Nancy’!!!”

Ken Dryden got his law degree at McGill

McGill, huh. That pretty much cements it. We’ll never hear from Chance, Guts, Tevin or Kianna ever again. B-ball practice starts next Monday. Will our ace cub reporter, Brenda Starr wannabe Heather Burns/ be interviewing the Gilfather about his latest transfer student and his never-ending quest for second in the Valley?

All the world’s indeed a stage and we are merely players. Getty Lee. Seems appropriate to quote a Canadian artist since our local hero has decided to take his talents north of the border.

From whence did this standing-on-tables-announcement tradition arise? These kids are too young to have seen Dead Poets Society…

Oh dis donc! This guy’s not going to be able to handle the 5% beer let alone the Laval linebackers.

That Chance is some nonconformist, all right. Since he supposedly ignored all the schools clamoring for his signature, I guess we have to assume McGill didn’t recruit him.

He’s fleeing the country? Mercy!

As he steps down from the table, Chance slips on Mopman’s super-waxed floor, shatters his pelvis, and ends his football career without even taking a single snap at McGill. I bet that makes him blowtop mad!

And he’ll finally get universal healthcare.

In all reality , I hypnotize myself ,aye, now a great hockey player , My goal is to play in THE NHL ,want me to sing Oh Canada ?

The helmets got his attention, a coat of arms with three “Marlets” -a mythological bird that can’t land because it has no feet. Like the NFL’s Washington team they’re still trying to settle on a name after dropping Redmen (not about Indians but their school colors) still don’t want to offend anyone.

Canadian football?

P 2: “…good for you…now get off my sandwich…”

Who cares?

Chance should fit right in at McGill, which has missed the playoffs 11 of the last 14 years!

In other words, Canadians generally have not made football an object of worship, like many do here in the States…

And they haven’t had a winning season since 2002!

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Laurent_Duvernay-Tardif This impressive athlete attended this fine school and got to play in a super bowl and complete med school !!!

“Uh, and I am also getting therapy for the whole blowtop mad thing…”

P 2.5: …crickets…..

He doesn’t want to play football so he’s going to a Canadian school to play football where almost nobody gives a damn. See, you guys all thought the resolution to this was going to be lame!

And speaking of lame, Mopped Up Thorp is online too!

https://moppedupthorp.wordpress.com/