Gil Thorp by Henry Barajas and Rachel Merrill for July 14, 2022

“I slave all day over a hot stove to make you this meal of pink stuff and green lumpy stuff and white fluffy stuff and little yellow balls and THIS is the thanks I get???”

Is this whole awards ceremony conducted just to give out one award? Because everyone in the audience is looking at their wristwatches and signaling this windbag to wrap it up.

Of all of the weird “targeted” ads I’ve gotten on this site, this one I just got for a company selling freestanding water tanks and “casualty simulation kits” (create 70 individual wounds!) to fire companies is definitely the most intriguing.

Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

At 4:45 am I’m wide awake for this one.

P1 Mom blows her stack after dad asks her to pull his finger for the one hundredth time during dinner

P2 After mom finally gives in and gives dad a prolonged finger yank, our young story teller thinks, “oh man, that one’s a real eye burner, what crawled up your *ss and died, dad?”

P3 Mom pops off the first EES of the story arc as it appears she is winding up to lay a forearm shiver upside the young man’s head

Pointing fingers, melting faces and EES, while it’s too early to tell if the story quality is improved, it’s comforting to know the artwork remains consistent

P1 “Bring me another cold Hoo, woman!”

Well, Mr. Barajas is off to a rousing start. Quick get to the butter knife or hippo already

Yeah ,in all reality , I took all my anger out on the field and opposing teams gave me a beat down and when they finished with me they started on my teamates .

P3 – “Thank you, ma’am, may I have another!”

So… Without enough time left for a Country Club golf arc before pre-season football workouts we’re going to get this speech for the next month about something Gil did years ago… That got him named coach of the year now?

This is not Jamal “Ghost” Gaddis or Hamani “Hambone” Gaines. Who is this guy with the fake plastic tears?

Wait! Is this true? Keri – I just heard that this new writer is letting us return to Milford. I…I…I can’t believe it. Does this mean we’ve made our last cheap Mudlarks sweatshirt? I mean, I was happy to get that raise last month to $0.15/hour, but it will be nice to be able to go back home to Milford.

P 3: “…sniff…sniff…please, Ma…..don’t make me eat this s***…”

P1: “…tastes great….”,…“…less filling…”

4 days in and no new kid or transfer introduced? Not even sure we will see the CC this year. Going right into football??

No wonder the family is unhappy. They needed an “open concept” house where the mother could see the whole downstairs from the kitchen. That’s the only way to live, take it from HGTV.

Bitsy nailed P-1. For P-2: The origin of the term :snake eyes". P-3: How can you have any puddin’, if you haven’t eatin’ your meat!

You know things are bad at home when the dad has to have a beer with dinner. The mom drinks nothing (like some kind of psycho) while the kid smashes his potatoes with his Hoo!. Rough to see his mascara start running when his mom hits him with some close up EES. And speaking of running, you should be running to Mopped Up Thorp to read today’s installment.

https://moppedupthorp.wordpress.com/

P3: Is that what’s supposed to happen to an earring when you lean over like that?

Ma is so angry that no one is eating from her massive bowl of Brussel sprouts that her hand shrank three sizes!

And we finished second in the valley again. The end.

Reminds me of a song when I was a young feller. But you don’t have to closer to trace the tracks of his tears…