Monty by Jim Meddick for April 05, 2016

Heck.

Yeah, yeah…. and 07734 makes your calculator give you a nerdy greeting.

I only know cos… um…. somebody told me…. uh huh.

And of course there was 71077345 …the answer to a variable riddle, depending on current events and the teller’s political persuasion…

One version:You fiddle with the buttons saying you’re analyzing some data that will help show what’s causing pollution in the blah-blah ocean….and hand the other person the calculator so the display is upside down.

Sorry, you just can’t do side-splitting humor like that on a smartphone, with its screen-rotating, high-res graphics… especially those pointy-topped fours.

Nope, to be that cool you need a real calculator, with 7-segment numerals…uh huh…. Maybe even some red LEDs. But you can’t always be that lucky….

Maledizione! The orchestral background thunders! The Team will die off, one by one, under mysterious circumstances. Finally, there will be the decisive final confrontation between Old Man Nuttingham and The Fired Accountant….What a film this will be!

Susan, you’re great,….Thank you….

How many of you actually did this with your calculators . . . I did. hahaha

Well, it depends upon the font used by the calculator. And if you try it on an iPhone, the display shifts to stay right side up anyway. How can a “smart phone” be so dumb?

Try 7734206.

Not this kid again already.

“Enter sixteen percent of balance from Form 1040-Z on line 32-Q. If figure is greater than that on line 29-P of Schedule TT, subtract 3.2 percent of line 69-F. If less than the amount shown on Line Square Root of 15, on Schedule i, go to Form 7734 Inverted.” – From “On a Pale Horse” by Piers Anthony.

That’s H E double hockey sticks for those of you with out anOld timey calculator.