Non Sequitur by Wiley Miller for April 22, 2020

I wouldn’t go through adolescence again for all the money in the world.

I second that…

I believe this is a rerun.

Yes, from April, 2016.

Please do NOT reply if you read this arc the first time, as I missed it: I’m wondering if the old lady is also Kate.

I thought this looked familiar. But well-done on the “let’s hide my changing figure with which I’m not comfortable” posture.

Judging by those age-doors, she’s gonna be wishing she was back there again really soon.

The trouble with knowing what the future holds is not knowing how to get there.

I am writing a fictitious book: “101 Reasons I am Glad I’m Not a Girl.” Whenever I hear of a women’s issue I blurt out a random number. Sometimes it’s silly stuff women do, other times it’s serious.

It was bad enough battling testosterone – however, its effects can be abated – you can burn it off with physical activity. It may make you aggressive, but normally does not make you psychotic.

On the other hand, I think there are more stable chemical reactions going on in a meth lab than occur in a girl’s body as she goes through puberty: and it doesn’t stop there – pregnancy, menopause, PMS – no thank you!

Also, boys have minor changes in their anatomy: girls have major reconstruction.

So in the days before I was born and God asked me what gender I wanted to be, I think I made the right choice.

Reminds me of the Alice Cooper song “18” (I’m a boy and I’m a man). I turned 18 away from home in my freshman year of college. The great escape.

There should be a Trump door.

If I knew the what I know now…I’d still screw up, it’s in my nature, but not as often.

“Hold on to 16 as long as you can, changes comin’ ’round real soon make us women and men.”

John Mellencamp

I remember young women who drank and smoked to look older – boy, did that work – MUCH older.

I want my teenage body, but not the brain.

Be happy where you are. It only gets worse.

Between Wiley and Stephen King, there is a lot of strange stuff going on in the Maine woods.

I sign in with Facebook but keep getting logged out.

How old does she have to get to make her flakey, insular, and self righteous like Victoria?

This reminds me of the opening credits of “Being Erica”

A “do over”? A chance to do it right, this time? Oh yes…a thousand times yes. Please, please, please…. I promise to do it right this time.

Caveat Traveler, Kate: it only gets worse the older you get. At 24 you’re trying to figure out what to do for a living. At 34 you’re wondering if your 401K will have enough. At 44 there’s menopause…

Better just go back Kate.