Off the Mark by Mark Parisi for June 08, 2013

The “Unhappy Meal”.

You want fries with that?

“Eat in or take out?”“Yes”

Wow, that country must be right down the street.

Oh. So that’s where that serve yourself joint down the street called “Used To Be 5 Guys” came from.

I see FIVE GUYS, but no burgers and fries!

Out Of Business sale starts today!! . . . ☻

He needs to cut down on the suites!

Highly nutritious and extra fiber in the peelings.

An hour later, he’ll want some Mo.

Got lunch from there today.

I once attended a meeting where the icebreaker involved saying our name and our favorite place to eat. I said, “My name is Ghidra, and my favorite place to eat is downtown Tokyo.” They got it after a moment.

And their burgers are terrible. First time I walked into one, a sign hanging over the order counter proclaimed, “WE PROUDLY SERVE ALL BURGERS WELL DONE.” I thought, “Great, you take joy is inflicting hockey pucks upon your customers!” Been in there twice, once as a favor to some schoolkids I knew who were doing a fundraiser out of there. Still sucked. I can get a better burger — orders of magnitude better — at the seafood joint next door. No lie. And here’s the bad part: Proving that Americans have no taste when it comes to food, they keep getting voted “best burger” in their various markets. Who are they paying to get these ratings!? Cause their burgers sure as hell don’t measure up!