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David_Porta Free

Recent Comments

  1. over 15 years ago on Last Kiss

    Why is it set up so Election Day is in November, and Tax Day is in April? Shouldn’t Tax Day be, like, two weeks before Election Day? Good punchline.

  2. over 15 years ago on Last Kiss

    Clearly it was my fault, John. He knows how anal I am about not being late to a movie. (The same as how the Woody Allen character in “Annie Hall” was.)

    And, of course, women are NEVER late.

    Another pal, aspiring actor, was always late for everything not actor related. “Why is that, Jerry?” “Well, Dave, my psychiatrist says it is a recognized pathology; something to do with drawing attention to myself.”

    Of course, women NEVER do anything designed to draw attention to themselves.

  3. over 15 years ago on Last Kiss

    His friend, Dave, is in from out of town. They all decide to see a movie. A time is chosen, and Husband tells Wife, “We’ll be leaving at 3pm.” She agrees. At 3pm, Husband says, “We’re leaving.” Wife isn’t ready. She has her own car. Husband says, “It’s 3pm. I’m taking Dave, like we agreed. You can come when you’re ready. See you there.” When she finally arrives, she’s angry. Dave leaves them to discuss it. Later, he asks Husband, “What where you guys saying?” Husband: “I just explained to her that she didn’t have any reason to be angry.”