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ChuckKeyser Free

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  1. about 4 years ago on Doonesbury

    Science suggests that after the Big Bang, god smoked a cigarette, rolled over, went to sleep, and hasn’t been heard from since.

    An alternative theory is that the Big Bang was the event that occurred just before the gleam in your father’s eye faded.

    However, the Bibble teaches that he woke up, knocked up a poor carpenter’s fiancé, convinced the locals that it was a virgin birth, and then threw his illegitimate son under the bus when he turned out to be a liberal. The locals testified that the son appeared to them after his death, a story that perseveres to this day, often as images on the crusts of toasted cheese sandwiches.

    God has strong Republican CEO core values…(Banana Republicans have no values whatever…)

    And since when do Republican values have anything to do with Christianity?