Reality Check by Dave Whamond for March 21, 2012

You can check out any time you like but you can never leave…guitar solo!

As long as you pay the bill!!

A place that doesn’t provide room service just can’t make them stay

Someone should write a song about this.

Ahem, apologies to Henly/Frey

On a dark desert highwayCool wind in my hairWarm smell of tortillasRising up through the airUp ahead in the distanceI saw an Impala’s tail lightsMy head grew heavy and my sight grew dimI had to stop for the night

There he stood in the drivewayOf an adobe houseAnd I was thinking to myselfThis can’t be Questa, but this could be TaosWhen he lit up a reeferAnd offered me a tryThere were cholos down the corridorI thought I heard them cry

Welcome to the Hotel EspanolaWhat a crazy placeWhat a loco placeTokin’ it up at the Hotel EspanolaAny time of yearYou can buy it here

His car is carefully paintedIt’s not a Mercedes BenzHe’s got a set of pretty chromium rimsThat he stole from a friend

How they drive down the highwaySlow summer cruiseSome drive to the buy heroinSome drive to buy booze

So he jacked up the hydrosAnd let the engine whineHe said .I’ve been cruising down this same damn street since 1969And still those cholos come cruising from far awayWake you up in the middle of the nightJust to drag down main

Welcome to the Hotel EspanolaWhat a crazy placeWhat a loco placePlenty of room at Hotel EspanolaWhat a nice surpriseBring your familia by

Velvet dice on the dashboardUpholstered with a touchHe said…I’d paint the Last Supper on the hood, but it would cost too much

And at his Grandma’s casaWe gathered for the feastShe can eat all the beans and riceBut she just can’t chew the meat

Last thing I rememberI was squealing down the streetI had to find the highway back to the town I passed last week

Relax, said the choloWe are programmed to smoke weedYou can cruise here anytime you likeBut you can never speed.

Plenty of room at Hotel EspanolaWhat a nice surpriseBring your familia by.

“Lyrics” by by Gilbert J. Garduño

You’ll care when they stab you with their steely knives…Was on a week long high school band trip back in the 70’s, the bus driver only had two tapes – Heart – Dreamboat Annie, and Eagles – Hotel California. The heart tape got played once, and then the Eagles tape was left on continuous play for the rest of the week…

Should we know who Greg is?

good one, dem

At least Motel 6 leaves the light on for you.

Hey, dude, take it easy. Don’t let the sound of our boot heels drive you crazy!