Ripley's Believe It or Not by Ripley’s Believe It or Not! for July 06, 2022

As a sports announcer, I’m often asked questions about great players in various sports. Recently, someone asked me who I thought was the greatest all-around baseball player of all time. “Oh, that’s easy,” I replied. “It has to be Willie Mays.” [Note: the late Hall of Fame announcer Ernie Harwell also held this position, so I knew I was in good company.]

My questioner persisted, however: “What do you think his batting average would be if he were playing today?”

“Oh, probably .200, maybe .220,” I responded.

“That low?” he exclaimed. “Do you think pitching has improved that much in fifty years?”

“No,” I told him. “But you have to remember he’s ninety years old.”

If you’ve ever seen a beaver’s teeth, you’d notice that they’re quite orange. This isn’t from tooth decay, or drinking carrot juice; it’s actually because the enamel of their teeth are reinforced by iron, which helps them to put up with all the strain of biting through trees for years.

That sinkhole is the entrance to Tarzan’s Pellucidar from last month.

Beavers as large as bears? Is that the tooth? Well, Dam!

https://a-z-animals.com/blog/beaver-teeth-everything-you-need-to-know/

More about Beaver’s teeth. Their front teeth continue to grow their entire life, thus their life long obsession with chewing on trees.

So there’s these two beavers…

one is named Joe and the other, Steven. Joe and Steven have a fire. Joe decides he’s hungry so he grabs a pan and some sticks.

Steven runs over and says “Joe what are you doing?” And Joe says “I’m just grilling up some sticks.”

Steven immediately smacks the pan from Joe’s paw and says

“JOE THATS A NON STICK PAN”

Until next time.

We need a large sinkhole in Washington, D.C.

Take care, may disappointed voter John Q. “Well I Guess They’re Doing Their Best But Their Best At What?” Publicord be with you, and gesundheit.

Giant beavers? So- did any trees survive that period?

Darn! They found the Secret Society of Trees, now they are going to ruin it

Does that beaver have a rat tail? Looks more like a nutria.

Roxy, a large black Labrador, was sitting up in his seat at the movies, wagging his tail, growling at the villain and barking excitedly at the hero’s escapades. The woman in the seat behind him was intrigued.Excuse me, she said, tapping Roxy’s owner on the shoulder, that dog is extraordinary. I’ve never seen anything like it!Yes, he’s surprised me, too, said the owner. He hated the book.

Wondering what the threshold for “entire” forest is. How do you know it’s complete? What would have to be removed for it to only be a partial forest?

Maybe we’ve got a music expert out there.

Fred Astaire’s “dancing on the ceiling” number in 1951—song “You’re All The World To Me”.

Eddie Cantor 1934 KID MILLIONS—“I Wanna Be A Minstrel Man”,by Irving Berlin—-IT’S THE SAME SONG!!

By two different composers.

There is a joke in there about giant beavers and bananas, but it has little appeal.

With beavers that big, there was no need for a #metoo movement.

In the Star Trek Universe, the Vulcans invented Velcro.