Speed Bump by Dave Coverly for May 16, 2018

Sounds fair. But how does Mommy manage to stand on her tiny feet?

Confusingly ever after.

Child of lawyers – poor kid!

I haven’t read Ninja Red Riding Hood.

In this one, the 3 bears capture and devour the burglar Goldilocks.

In the second story Goldilocks has to do 200 hours of community service and take bear sensitivity training.

Alternative truth.

Constables discover a girl held captive in an old building. Judging from the length of her hair, she had been neglected for years.

In another story, the suspect using the alias “Jack” is found to have planted beans that were the product of an unlawful GMO operation. He is later investigated by the IRS due to unreported golden-goose-egg income, and now faces felony giant-slaughter charges following the reckless destruction of an endangered species plant (which has the EPA considering a significant fine).

The moral is don’t steal. Now mommy will tell you why stealing is okay.

Could we please bring back the Fairness Doctrine?

“Evil Inc.” did this gag first. There the parents were a superhero and a supervillain.

Tonight’s stories are “The Very Hungry Caterpillar” and “The Bulimic Butterfly”.

Always “special interest” groups vying for power.