Speed Bump by Dave Coverly for November 18, 2022

If I want to eat something that tastes like meat I’m going to eat meat otherwise I’ll eat a salad

Is that a gag gift?

Possibly.

Heard today on the radio, tech company across the Bay will start producing lab-grown chicken.

They hibernate in your colon!

One of those is a lifetime supply.

Warning: Most consumers of this product will experience extreme constipation.

McDonald’s?

Its either a hockey puck or a door stop.!

It gives you nausea, heartburn, indigestion, upset stomach, diarrhea…

At my age, a lot of things are impassible. My doctor and I have a discussion when he looks at my blood test results. He asks, “When was the last time you ate?” I reply, “Do you mean the last time I had something in my mouth, or the last time I had something in my stomach? There can be a 12 hour difference.”

And to add insult to injury, the fake meat costs twice the real thing.

“Butt, that’s not possible!”

Maybe a small but enthusiastic market to runners who experience the “trots”.

hope he didn’t eat too many of them… might glog him up. :D

We tried one of those “Impossible” products a few months ago. It was like eating sawdust.

Doc recommends fruitcake.

What tha??

Lab produced faux-meats are mixed with insects for extra protein and nutrients.

Anything that is beans and grains has the opposite effect of impassable.

Good to have something that’ll stick with ya!

Why does vegetable matter have to try to appropriate meat culture?

My idea for annoying both meat eaters and vegetarians: tofurducken.

I had something very passable last night woo phew ;>(

Q: What did the cannibal say to his son? A: “If I want to eat something that tastes like meat I’m going to eat meat; otherwise I’ll eat a Sal, Lad.”