Tom the Dancing Bug by Ruben Bolling for September 20, 2013

Transcript:

Tom the Dancing Bug by Ruben Bolling After Russian President Vladimir Putin's successful New York Times op-ed piece defending the Syrian government, the newspaper offers him a permanent column... VLADIMIR PUTIN: CRUSADING COLUMNIST for The New York Times Man: That's it for the day, Mr. President. Vladimir: Good! Now I go to other job, as columnist for New York Times! New York - Vladimir: I've got nose for news! Woman: HELP! Vladimir: Ah, perfect! A crime story! Woman: This guy mugged me at GUNPOINT! Criminal: I don't even HAVE a GUN! Police Officer: You're under arrest! Vladimir: Hold on, Officer! What if this man gave his gun to ME for safekeeping? Criminal: Yeah, I'll do that! Vladimir: Yeah, I'll do that. Police Officer: All right...there's not much I can do. Vladimir: I sell you more guns tomorrow. Woman: You're a MONSTER! Vladimir: What a story for my column! I can't wait for it to be published! A City's Tragedy Imagine my surprise when I found that a woman I had just talked to on the street was found mysteriously dead. Certainly, she was a loud-mouthed complainer. And her Editor: Putin, you moron! There are two typos in your column! Vladimir: Ah, now I know what tragic death next week's column will be about...