Agnes by Tony Cochran for February 16, 2022

A critique to end all critiques.

She misspelled “toost”.

I thought Jeremy Duncan (from “Zits”) had cornered the market on Froot Loops.

froot loops – they taste better after a couple beers

Fr oo t  L oo ps  taste  g oo d

Right – as if Agnes’s grandma can afford name brand Froot Loops. More likely, something like Rainbow Rings or Colorful Circles.

I thought all the froot loops were in the white house?

Like a (knock knock) cereal should.

My daughter likes Froot Loops so much that when Coffee Mate came out with the Froot Loops flavor, she bought up 5 of them.

Say what you have to say and then shut up.

(I intend to when I run out of what I have to say.)

They also pose no danger of fruit poisoning.

“Wordy”? What does Trout want her to write: “Froot Loops good”? It’d sound like she had the Frankenstein monster as her editor.