Agnes by Tony Cochran for February 17, 2022

And now for the hot dog water recipes!

I have a better opinion of hotdogs than Agnes does, but what are these “gourmet hotdogs” that a certain online butcher shop keeps trying to sell me along with their steaks and chops? “Gourmet hotdog” should be an oxymoron.

I prefer (kosher) beef knockwurst.

More meat and less roll.

♪ put some mustard on my roll…

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b0I0yJk70HY

Cheap hot dogs can be very nasty tasting. However, Agnes IS correct in her assessment.

Even if we ate meat, we wouldn’t eat hotdogs. Do you know what’s in those things? It wonders me, as the Amish say, that folks who gag at scrapple will gladly eat a hotdog.

I stopped eating hotdogs the same year I stopped eating liverwurst.

That’s exactly how I feel about kale. Better than starving to death. I guess. Probably.

“Hot dogs are better than starving to death” … Oscar Mayer’s new catchy slogan.

If you pour ice water over a hot dog,

Does it become a chili dog?

I like hotdogs. I also prefer to not die.

Win/win!!

The worst hot dogs I’ve ever had were the ones provided by my son’s Cub Scout troop for cookouts and other events. They bought the cheapest crap.

That said, time for a rebuttal to all the hot dog naysayers here:

(1) My wife and I both enjoy hot dogs — not every day, just occasionally. Best ones from the supermarket are either kosher, or at least all beef, such as Nathan’s.

(2) I broil them, but if you have to boil them, don’t overdo it! I had a family member who would keep them at a rolling boil for 30 minutes. Yecch! This is the method I grew up with: boil the water, shut off the flame, put the hot dogs in the hot water for seven minutes. Remove from the water and serve immediately.