Aunty Acid by Ged Backland for March 01, 2023

That’s when I found out I can’t carry a tune. We aren’t even in the same area code. I had no idea. I was trying out for Choir in High School. We had to record ourselves and play it back and assess our voice. Yikes!

https://i.ibb.co/tzKDbjN/LAME.jpg

Not me. I know I’m bad. I even sing softly when required in a public setting so no one will have to hear how bad.

I can’t do that. There’s a court order.

Everybody thinks their voice is weird when they hear it played back. You’re hearing it the way everybody else does.

I used to be okay. I used to sing in Yahoo Karaoke rooms.

I was in the San Diego Choral Club as a 1st soprano. We recorded albums twice a year. It took three hours to record 45 minutes of music. It’s tiring.

The world has lost a great (off-key) talent!

I could have been a very famous music star — a triple threat in vocals, piano, and song writing. But as I looked ahead I saw too many struggles: The hassles of touring, composing and making recordings, troubles with managers cheating, hoards of groupies, multiple divorces, too much money, drug abuse, arrest for possession, drug rehabilitation, making new albums, an exhausting come-back tour, making TV ads for compilation albums of my greatest hits …

It just didn’t seem worth the trouble and heartache! I’m sorry to have deprived you all of my glorious artistry. When I pass, my heirs may find that tape I made so many years ago and mourn the loss … :’(

Learning French, I used a language laboratory. Listening to my recording, after the first lesson, I almost gave up then and there – It was horrible…

No I never did. I only sang in Church and always sang Softly and Tenderly. It’s also a hymn, Softly and Tenderly Jesus is calling. My voice was soft and tenderly – low. Not to offend.

Nope, never. Recorded my voice speaking. That would be enough to discourage recording me singing.

Not a liar. I knew very young I had no singing voice. I do have other skills, but my voice was never recorded for singing. I would sometimes, however, get my way with my older brother when I told him if he didn’t do/not do something, I would sing. That would make him give in, every time. I barely will sing to a song I like in the car alone with the windows up. I shudder to think what I might sound like on a recording. I do envy people who can sing like there is nothing to it.

The good Lord bestowed upon me more blessings than any man deserves. However, a good (or even tolerable) singing voice is not among them. I doubt my range even spans a full octave.

I sound bad to myself even in the shower. I’m flatter than a bottle of soda that’s been left open for three days. I’m flatter than many Midwestern states. And to be sexist about it, I’m flatter than Twiggy.

Paul Simon has a song, “Kotachrome.” My theme song is “Monotone.”

There is a restraining order in the City of Long Beach, NY against my brother-in-law and me. We are not allowed within 100 feet of any operating microphone in a public venue.

If there were such a thing as in-flight karaoke, people would still get up and walk out on me.

I always knew I wasn’t very good. Then a family camp my wife belonged to had a party with karaoke. I had too much to drink, let them coerce me into singing one song and have been banned since.

Pretty much.

A few times

Like several others here, I never recorded myself singing. I could carry a tune, but I never had any kid of delusion that I had a great voice.

I don’t want anyone to hear me sing. It would attract talent scouts, who would award me with recording contracts, and I would become rich and famous. I am just too accustomed to sitting in my recliner in front of the tv getting fatter and lazier. Quite a loss for mankind but you will all have to accept it.

My dad described his singing voice as a “bumble bee in a jug.” I have a similar talent.

I’m not lying, I’ve never recorded my singing. And I did plenty of singing in my youth, in the church choir and the school glee club.

Back in my pro-chorister days I did a fair bit of soloing, but once during a recording session I did a take that was so bad, I completely lost confidence & was afraid to open my mouth for six months afterwards…

Nope, not lying, I’ve always been sure I’m not talented.

Years ago I recorded myself singing ♪I wish you a merry Christmas♪ and sent it to my online friends.

Wow, you’re spot on with this one!

okay, i’m lying…

This is probably an old joke off an old movie or radio program: My father often asked my non-musical relatives to sing, and then request they sing “Far, Far Away.”

Used to sing semi-professionally. ALWAYS hated hearing recordings of it.

Never recorded myself singing. I have the distinction of being the only girl not allowed to be part of compulsory choir at my high school.