Broom Hilda by Russell Myers for October 07, 2023

ARF ARF

The only thing worse than computers is trying to get someone to service them.

Computers are more like cats, they can sense when you hate them, they just don’t care about it.

Computers don’t bite. They do sort of growl, and they definitely disobey!

Then why does mine start chuckling when I get frustrated?

Does that mean that one day they’ll roll over and play dead?

Ah, the Banana 9000. I haven’t seen one of those in a long time.

Computers are the work of the Devil. What, haven’t you seen someone at a computer keyboard taking the Lord’s name in vain? Of course you have. All the time.

Love the banana instead of the apple

Who’s a good computer?

This morning, my desktop through a tantrum, refusing to startup. With some coaxing and tender loving care, it started up as usual. For now. But, mostly, my pc is old reliable, and a dependable friend. Thanks, Gateway.

They can also tell when you fear them. This is why, as a computer tech, I’d sometimes go on a house call for a computer that’s Now Working Perfectly But I Swear I Tried The Same Thing And It Wouldn’t Start!

Sandy says ‘arf’ to that.

“Oh, drat these computers. They’re so naughty and so complex. I could pinch them.” – Marvin the Martian

With that banana logo on the laptop, I’m wondering if that’s an iFruit clone from Foxtrot comics?

And with AI on its way to dominate you’d best get ready.

“Don’t anthropomorphize computers. They hate that.”

I’m glad I have great repoire with dogs.

That desk is in a precarious position, that computer may get stress tested.

My computer bites me all the time! It’s not the computers fault it’s the g o d a m n e d MS’s fault, they screw up my pc all the time with their constant take-over to upgrade…

Bananas go woof?

Aww. Who’s a good computer? You are! Yes, you are!

I just went through this with my wife last night. They are, in fact, dumb as rocks, due to the fact that computer chips are made from highly purified silicon, with some metal doping. This does not mean that they cannot react to you. I’m retired now, but over my IT career I have found too many instances where a user did exactly the right thing, and the computer did the wrong thing. It got to where I was telling the users that I totally believed their stories. And then I did the exact same thing, and it worked perfectly. I have come to believe that computers sense my presence, and fear me, understanding on some low, machine-level way what I can do to them. Anyway, that’s my story, and I’m sticking to it. ;>)