Close to Home by John McPherson for March 10, 2010

  1. Emerald
    margueritem  over 14 years ago

    What, is she a Black Widow?

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    Edcole1961  over 14 years ago

    Alright, how about signing up for the layaway plan?

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  3. Text if you d like to meet him
    Yukoneric  over 14 years ago

    Serial……………

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  4. Beaufaceshot
    js305  over 14 years ago

    When a family member passed away a few years ago we had the option of buying a “lifetime warranty” with the casket. It had a “standard” 50 year warranty for no extra charge.

    We asked if this included maid service or regular oil changes…

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    eardroppings  over 14 years ago

    how about a lay away plan

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  6. Artrazz 2
    fredbuhl  over 14 years ago

    maybe it’s the Old Woman in the Shoe

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  7. Smiley tongue
    Smiley Rmom  over 14 years ago

    js305 - LOL! Just went through this recently, as my mom passed away this fall. The cemetery would give the family members discounts, if we bought our plots, vaults, etc. within a certain time frame. Me? No embalming, cremate immediately, are my instructions. Dig a hole, dump my ashes, and plant a tree or bush. Much cheaper! (And is legal if we do it on property we own.)

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  8. Whatwouldblue
    mrslukeskywalker  over 14 years ago

    I worked as Office Manager for the last custom casket company on the east coast. They closed in 1991. A casket that cost $800 for a funeral home to buy finished from us, was then sold by them for $8,000! That’s the standard markup. When the company salesman died, he was cremated.

    The supersealers are only for your peace of mind. If they can suck the air out, it can also get back in.

    Also, people like to call them coffins. A coffin is the shape of what Dracula sleeps in. The rectangular ones are caskets. The media likes to use the word “coffin” improperly, while they disrespect our fallen troops.

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  9. Punky brewster23
    battycomic Premium Member over 14 years ago

    She must be related to the Grim Reaper somehow.

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    wench381  over 14 years ago

    Actually my in laws needed the frequent buyer option lost 3 in 18 months

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  11. Frog4
    Digital Frog  over 14 years ago

    My mom used to get calendars from the local funeral home for “being such a good customer” (She used to sing in a quartet that often performed at funerals)

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  12. Gail headshot72
    GailRubin  over 14 years ago

    A casual shopper is not going to be in a funeral home looking for a casket - but a smart shopper will be checking them out before someone in the family dies, and doing some funeral planning ahead of need. Just had to feature this on today’s Family Plot Blog! http://TheFamiyPlot.wordpress.com

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  13. Deficon
    Coyoty Premium Member over 14 years ago

    They’re cheaper at Wal-Mort.

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    Dapperdan61  Premium Member over 14 years ago

    How many times do they expect us to die to get the discount ?

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    alan.gurka  over 14 years ago

    Oh sure! After she’s already gone and buried 5 husbands they offer her the special deal!

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