Brevity by Dan Thompson for May 30, 2013

What’s green and sings? Elvis Parsley…..Thank you, I’ll be here all week, or weak, as the case may be….

Definitely not parsing his words, eh?

I personally think he’s a plant by the prosecution…

Susan, is that one of your tomatoes…..?

And yes, I’m working on my triple entendre……

you say tomato, i say tomatoyou eat potato and i eat potatotomato, tomato, potato, potatolet’s call the whole thing off

She doesn’t look condiment to stand trial.

He’s claims to be parsley, but is actually chilantro, and didn’t suit her taste. She rues the day she diced him. And anyway, since then she’s been doing the habanera with Senor Habanero and the mysterious Bhut Jolokia – each of them burning to get into her salsa.

Variety is the spice of life.

The IRS can garnish your wages without benefit of due process, and if your employer does not comply, the employer becomes responsible for your tax bill. Just sayin’.

Is he with the law offices of Parsley, Sage, Rosemary & Thyme?

Susan, have they left any good puns on the table?

Sounds like he’s been chopped.

she claims to be parsley pregnant and that’s the un garnished truth

I realize court is dull. This is one way to spice it up.