Big Nate by Lincoln Peirce for November 20, 1994

Transcript:

man: The soccer team had a successful season this year. Nate: Translation: we didn't get blown out of EVERY game. man: We won some, we lost some...and we had a lot of fun! Nate: We won two, we lost twelve, and we worked like dogs. man: The most valuable player award goes to the young man who was consistently the team's best performer!... Nate: Like Stan's not gonna win. man: ...Stan Kuzia! Nate: Ooh, big surprise! He only scored 90% of our goals! man: The coach's award goes to the player with the most dedication, perseverance, and team spirit!... Nate: It also helps to suck up to the coach all season. man: ...Alan Blount! Nate: Oh, THERE'S a shocker! Man, they always give these awards to the same people! man: ...And now for the most improved player award...this young man has really made great strides. Nate: They never give awards to little guys like... man: ...NATE WRIGHT! You seem surprised, Nate. Nate: Is there an award for "most speechless"?