Ballard Street by Jerry Van Amerongen for July 02, 2015

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    Last Rose Of Summer Premium Member over 9 years ago

    Martin, who is a graduate, wasn’t a very apt pupil. He always measured once and cut twice.

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    Last Rose Of Summer Premium Member over 9 years ago

    This was Martin’s graduation thesis, He got a C+

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    Last Rose Of Summer Premium Member over 9 years ago

    Martin has been tinkering again in his garage, Saturday can’t come soon enough……

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    SusanSunshine Premium Member over 9 years ago

    Good one, Dogsniff….

    Actually, Martin knows he gets into trouble standing up and moving around….

    He prefers hiding out.Sometimes, if no one else is home, he gets lost, just in the recesses of his own mind….

    Alone with Martha, under the table will suffice.

    If more people are around… he goes farther afield…

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    SusanSunshine Premium Member over 9 years ago

    Monkey! Hope you’re OK!

    Don’t worry about the Tiki…everything is under konttroowllll…..

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    damifid0  over 9 years ago

    Good morning everyone. I hope things are looking good for Martin,cause things here are nice and sunny. Have a great day all. :) Peace.

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    Linguist  over 9 years ago

    Martin was trying to table the discussion with Martha, because she had a leg up on him. Unfortunately, she floored him with her logic and he was forced acknowledge her point of view.

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    miscreant  over 9 years ago

    Martin has her fooled. Little does she realize it is only because she wears dresses that he is always under the table or on the floor. What she will not show willingly, he must find a way to she on his own, but don’t let her know.

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    Vet Premium Member over 9 years ago

    Martin….“Ma’am it looks like you have some damage to the frame but it is fixable. We’ll get that oil changed then rotate the table legs.”Martin just recently retired from the auto service industry……memories are hard to forget.

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    Perkycat  over 9 years ago

    Just give him a little kick in the head…..maybe knock some sense into him. Love all the past comics to go with this one!

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    Linguist  over 9 years ago

    He just want rev up his evenings with Gladys, a bit. Vroom,Vroom…outta the living room – into the bedroom !

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    Liverlips McCracken Premium Member over 9 years ago

    @beviek:I know nothing of any strawberry/rhubarb pie.

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    Liverlips McCracken Premium Member over 9 years ago

    Martin has his own …………… er, ………………… perspective on life.

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    Happy, happy, happy!!! Premium Member over 9 years ago

    Jokes that are so bad that they are good.1. Two antennas met on a roof, fell in love and got married. The Ceremony wasn’t much, but the reception was excellent.2. A jumper cable walks into a bar. The bartender says, “I’ll serve you, but don’t start anything.”3. A woman has twins and gives them up for adoption. One of them goes to a family in Egypt and is named “Ahmal.” The other goes to a family in Spain; they name him “Juan.” Years later, Juan sends a picture of himself to his birth mother. Upon receiving the picture, she tells her husband that she wishes she also had a picture of Ahmal. Her husband responds, “They’re twins! If you’ve seen Juan, you’ve seen Ahmal.”3. A dyslexic man walks into a bra.5. A man walks into a bar with a slab of asphalt under his arm and says: “A beer please, and one for the road.”6. Two cannibals are eating a clown. One says to the other: “Does this taste funny to you?”7. “Doc, I can’t stop singing ‘The Green, Green Grass of Home.’” “That sounds like Tom Jones Syndrome.” “Is it common?” Well, “It’s Not Unusual.”8. Two cows are standing next to each other in a field. Daisy says to Dolly, “I was artificially inseminated this morning.” “I don’t believe you,” says Dolly. “It’s true, no bull!” exclaims Daisy.9. An invisible man marries an invisible woman. The kids were nothing to look at either.10. Deja Moo: The feeling that you’ve heard this bull before.11. I went to buy some camouflage trousers the other day but I couldn’t find any.12. A man woke up in a hospital after a serious accident. He shouted, doctor, doctor, I can’t feel my legs!" The doctor replied, “I know you can’t, I’ve cut off your arms!”13. I went to a seafood disco last week… and pulled a mussel.14. What do you call a fish with no eyes? A fsh.15. Two fish swim into a concrete wall. The one turns to the other and says “Dam!”16. Two Eskimos sitting in a kayak were chilly, so they lit a fire in the craft. Unsurprisingly it sank, proving once again that you can’t have your kayak and heat it too.17. A group of chess enthusiasts checked into a hotel and were standing in the lobby discussing their recent tournament victories. After about an hour, the manager came out of the office and asked them to disperse. “But why,” they asked, as they moved off. “Because,” he said, “I can’t stand chess-nuts boasting in an open foyer.”18. Two peanuts walk into a bar, and one was a salted.19. Mahatma Gandhi, as you know, walked barefoot most of the time, which produced an impressive set of calluses on his feet. He also ate very little, which made him rather frail and with his odd diet, he suffered from bad breath. This made him. (Oh, man, this is so bad, it’s good…) A super calloused fragile mystic hexed by halitosis.20. And finally, there was the person who sent twenty different puns to his friends, with the hope that at least ten of the puns would make them laugh. No pun in ten did!!!!!!!!

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    Dry and Dusty Premium Member over 9 years ago

    Every time I get a chance to drop by here lately, it has been SO quiet! How is everyone? Did the Tiki Bar close down for renovations or something?

    Take care all of you!

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