Richard's Poor Almanac by Richard Thompson for December 14, 2015

Transcript:

Santa will be available at secure locations for gift consultation with those children who clear our stringent screening process. We'll need a urine sample & a statement verifying your niceness signed by a parent or guardian. Santaland Please step between the magic candy canes. Santa's Workshop Ho ho ho. Defrost concluded by expressing confidence that Santa is on track to make this the merriest Christmas in recent memory. I have a question for Santa. It's really hard hitting. Santa is feeding his reindeer and is unavailable for comment. Thank you for your time. Many bystanders were reportedly overcome by feelings of joy & longing. I want that thing I saw on TV! Just bring me a movie tie-in. And nothing educational. You hear me? Others weren't so sure. Those damn elves towed my car!