Rubes by Leigh Rubin for July 21, 2010

The good ones will feed every one else too - for a price.

The Wise Man should know that, in this case, silence is golden. Now he sleeps with the fishes.

Job security.

How wise can he be if he says that in front of a fishmonger.

Don’t kill the prophet, open a bait shop.

Give your wife a fish and you have dinner Teach your wife to fish and you lose free weekends

Isn’t it illegal to chum the waters that close to shore?

FishStix You say that like it’s a bad thing.

build a man a fire, you keep him warm for a day. set a man on fire, you keep him warm the rest of his life.

Steal a man’s fish and he goes hungry for a day.

Bash in his boat so he can’t fish and deplete the fish stocks with your fleet of trawlers and you drive him and all his fellows into poverty so you can complain about their drain on the “economy”.

Meanwhile they all starve to death before you can pretend they “deserved it.”

Then you can pretend that you really wanted to “teach” them to fish but they were too lazy.

The prophet’s eating into that guy’s profit.

In many jurisdictions, throwing prophets off piers is considered a public service.

Throw him in the water, and he’ll drown; but teach him how to swim, and he’ll keep coming back.

Maybe he just gave in to pier pressure…