Richard's Poor Almanac by Richard Thompson for March 17, 2016

Transcript:

Richard's Poor Almanac by Richard Thompson Spring Comes to DC Spring came to the DC area at 1:49 this morning, arriving in a bright green SUV accompanied by an entourage of aides, bodyguards, butterflies & tweeting birds. Speaking to the press, spring announced the formation of a spring omnimedia, which she described as a synergistic entity with a strong focus on growth &, utilizing an array of print & broadcast media, high-end merchandising opportunities & a substantial web presence. When a reporter asked if she was trying to become the new Martha Stewart, spring became visibly irritated. Before her aides could intervene, spring unleashed a lightning bolt that turned the reporter to a small pile of mulch. A spokesman for spring later described her as very sorry & said she'd sent the reporter a flower arrangement & a nice card. Spring Ow