Gil Thorp by Henry Barajas and Rachel Merrill for June 29, 2016

Because Boo was always supportive — never an unkind word from her.

P4: (fap fap fap) (fap fap fap) (fap fap fap …)

Who was in that third car on the grassy knoll?

I guess this story is winding down. The girls have played their required 3 games and the boys will have theirs next. Will Young Master Bader show? Will there be trial and punishment? Will the pickup driver (Marty?) surface? Or will we head straight to Milford CC never to mention this story again? Stay tuned.

Carrie’s actually sobbing because, with a 12.0 ERA, she knows her career as a starter is over.

Not sure what’s happening behind that dialogue box in P2, but that consolation hug might be getting a little more affectionate than usual.

So the “storybook outcome” would be that shortly after star pitcher Boo Radley dies in a violent car crash, backup pitcher Carrie Hobson gets her first ever start and ekes out a win and THEY ALL LIVED HAPPILY EVER AFTER. Except for Boo, of course, who was still dead. The End.

If you think about it, Carrie is (indirectly) crying over spilled milk.

But Carrie, that was the best tribute of all – your giving up 12 runs make the no-hitter that Boo pitched on the last day of her life seem all the more special!

Jefferson, you monsters! Couldn’t you have had the decency to throw the game?

In all reality , How dumb are you MA ? You want me to go to school where everyone hates my guts . FYI , I joined the Marines, Semper Fi , see you in Hell .

They need to let us know who was driving the pickup? What is all the secrecy? I wonder if Berry’s Mom even knows Boo is dead

Master Bader will keep his bat at home. I suppose he was rubbed the wrong way.

C’mon Ma Bader, first you tell Barry it’s not a good idea to go to school after the murder accident, now you’re trying to force him to go and get his ass beat by Big Ken Brown and others. And speaking of beat, hope you can beat the rush of those scrambling to read today’s Mopped Up Thorp.

I wonder if we’ll have Barry Bader to kick around for the next two years.

If you’re going to go Dark, go full dark: Master Bader hung himself in an auto-asphyxiation fap session gone wrong.

@Ellisburkes: No Eleanor was the mother of the Right Fielder; some kid named Rigby.

P-1: Sobbing is at the end of a good cry. This is Gil Thorp; she’s bawling. P-2: Ready or not, here I come.P-3: Father Flanagan says there’s no such thing as a bad boy so it probably isn’t really a sin. Besides, the team has turned Mennonite just so they can shun you. Now, go to school. Coach Thorp can’t make a deeply philosophical comment if you’re absent.

@Ellisburkes: My favorite line from the Ballad of Jeffrey Dahlmer- I’m like Eleanor Rigby. I have a face in a jar by the door.