Pearls Before Swine by Stephan Pastis for September 27, 2017

It means those years will come 10 years sooner.

I know this is a comic. But not only does your life become shorter, but that time is also spent sick more often. You don’t get to enjoy most of those few years left either.

Life is short – pig out NOW!

Old joke:

A man says to his doctor, “I don’t drink, don’t eat fatty food, and don’t fool around with loose women. Tell me, will I live to be a hundred?” And the doctor says, “What for?”

Cheers, Pig. But beer and ice cream together? Yuck!

This may be the most brilliant thing Pastis has ever done.

And then there is Hugh Hefner.

I refuse to spend my life worrying about what I eat. There is no pleasure worth forgoing just for an extra three years in the geriatric ward. — John Mortimer

My father, maternal grandfather, and brother all died before they were 50. I’m 65, so …

I for one plan to leave this world exactly as I entered it: naked, soaking wet, and screaming at the top of my lungs.

Life is too short for no-fat.

Doctor to patient: “It is either one hour of exercise per day or 24 hours of being dead per day.”

Well, this has all been depressing. I’m going back to my coffee and cinnamon roll.

Someone send Trump a lifetime free pass to KFC, and the Cheesecake Factory…

Pig said “longevity”? I didn’t know he was that articulate!

Not about food,but when someone asked George Burns ,at age 99, what his doctors thought about his cigar smoking habit..he responded….“My Doctors are all dead”!

Bill Hicks bit.

Good health is the slowest form of death!

Live life to the full. Because it WILL be over.

xxx

“If you can’t get to seventy by a comfortable road, don’t go.” Mark Twain.

OK — let’s think this out logically — the average lifespan of a domestic rat is just under 10 years — so if Rat is going to lose 10 years because of his unhealthy diet — he’ll end up back in the womb, then be reborn, eat the same foods, go back to womb…

Chow down, gents! Enjoy your life, such as it is, long or short. You only go around once, as they say….

I was born with kidney disease and now I’m on dialysis. You never know what’s gonna happen. Might as well have fun while you can.

this one really strikes a chord …

Quick disclaimer: I DID enjoy the joke. But then really quickly I got sad as I realized how many people I’ve heard expressing similar notions – and far too few of them were really joking. To make things worse, a small percentage of humans have genetic anomalies that make them resistant to the ill effects of a poor lifestyle. The rest of us are prone to using them as excuses to make bad choices. My wife and I can say from personal experience that turning away from a bad diet is one of the slowest and most difficult u-turns you’ll ever make. Yet even less than halfway to our goals we enjoy every day so much more than we used to, and people regularly underestimate our ages by a decade or more. Meanwhile we know numerous friends who deal with “age-related” health issues much earlier in life than their own parents. Anyone who falls for Rat’s philosophy will still experience those sad and lonely final ten years, cause longevity gets cut from the good part in the middle.

Longer’s not always better!! https://www.gocomics.com/pearlsbeforeswine/2017/02/09

Eat right exercise die anyway