FoxTrot Classics by Bill Amend for February 26, 2018

Oh, Roger, you’re a big help.

No, but your husband might!

It’d better self-destruct quickly if you do light it, Roger!

You better be all the way over at your mother’s house before you light that thing buster.

Guess what you’re having for dinner, Roger!

And Andy’s question was rhetorical, not literal!

Never ask if a day can get any worse! The answer is always, “Yes it can!”

As long as he doesn’t exhale, he should be fine.

Hey, Andie, the kids haven’t even started in yet!

He didn’t finish that question. I think he meant to ask “Mind if I light this baby up before dinner while I crap my brains out with diarrhea in the bathroom?” There would be a big-time stink! Probably have to call in a HAZ-MAT team!

“Not if you go stand outside by the garbage cans!”

“Yes, yes i do.”

Apropos strip for today. Everyone seems to be having a Monday to the nth degree today.

“Mind if I smoke?” “Why, no… mind if I fart?!” – Steve Martin

This is one strip you wouldn’t see in today’s paper. It’d generate complaints about “endorsement” of cigars.

First I thought Andy was devising excuses for not submitting a column.