Daddy's Home by Tony Rubino and Gary Markstein for March 16, 2018

For those who haven’t heard it, the Hindenburg gag goes like this: Q: What is the difference between Donald Trump and the Hindenburg? A: One is a flaming Nazi gasbag, and the other is a dirigible.

(whining)

Tony asked, about 8 hours ago

Are you funny (looks don’t count)?

Always. The definition may vary, though. It all lies in the eye of the specific beholder.

Alcohol doesn’t become ones’s appearance. Unless it’s in the after-shave, of course. Externally used.

If Peter were anything like my Dad…..

and Elliot made that announcement, he’d have to work on his stand-up act….

cos he wouldn’t be able to sit down for a week.

Meanwhile Tony asks:

‘Are you funny (looks don’t count)?"

I think so, Tony…..

cos just the other day I heard someone say,

“There’s something… I dunno…. kinda funny about Susan.”

OK, Tigressy …. that’s it!

How did you DO that?

Am I funny? Let’s just say, I had to keep my day job.

Funny? As in money, bunny, honey or business?

What he means is he’s not funny…or as funny as a broken leg.

Too soon?

One of my few talents is to take almost any situation and turn it into a stand-up comedy routine. Hey! I take ’em, where I can get ’em.

I just wonder why Eliot keeps falling for this kind of thing. He must be stupid to do so. Seems like each time, his dad encourages him in poor behavior or bad judgement and sends him to his mom. Then mom cuts him down. I would have learned that scenario after the first time, but then, I would not have those stupid ideas in the first place.

That kid never learns, does he?

Hidenburg?

Since looks don’t count you can count me out.