Pearls Before Swine by Stephan Pastis for May 14, 2018

Chewing all those Fritos burns up some calories.

That’s right get those jaw muscles moving!

Let me guess, New Year’s Resolution to exercise more that never made it further than Jan. 1st. I kept the last resolution I ever made. Simplest one to keep, stop making New Year’s Resolutions. Hadn’t managed to keep the ones before that (atypical of New Year’s Resolutions for the vast majority of us, we make them and then we fail to keep them for very long). But for over 20 years now, close to 30, I’ve kept that one cause I stopped worrying about making them.

Correction: loaded up on carbs!

I prefer to think of it as taking a more focused approach.

And muscle tone.

Do they still sell Fritos? I don’t recall seeing them for a while.

In Pig’s former life, he was the Frito Bandito, he’s put on a few pounds, but who hasn’t?

Plagiarism! That was MY journal!

It’s not polite to smack your lips…

I miss a continuing story that goes more than one strip in Pearls. Hasn’t been one for quite a while.

I used to keep an exercise journal. The problem wasn’t that I stopped working out, but that I got sick and tired of writing it up. Every year between June and late September there would be blank pages, then I’d start writing it up again in October.

Fritos make your breath smell

For me, the first rule of a journal or diary is to be the only one to read it.

Minor details, Pig.

This sounds like my physical therapy plan.

…I smell S lucrative tie-in Dael! Stephan! Get thee a good tax mouthpiece – Pronto!

I like Pig’s style. In fact, I emulate it, except for the “making New Year’s resolutions” part, which I just skip….

Looks like Pig’s efforts mean diddly squat.

I don’t think there are Fritos in my country, but I like Twisties!