FoxTrot Classics by Bill Amend for September 20, 2018

“Right after I call him.”

better not add tomato juice as the beverage either, Andy

It’s true then! Even budding geniuses have a warped sense of humor! (Shades of Harold and Maude)

Death by monkeys.

What did you do to those poor animals?

I found myself rubbing my face after I read this.

We were in the car, She was driving. The oldest (then about 6) put a ketchup packet on the back of the front seat & slammed his fist down. She felt something hit Her neck, touched it, saw red, and for about 5 seconds freaked out that She’d been shot.

We (including Her) still laugh about that one, and said kid is 41 now.

I doubt Dad will notice one way or the other. If Mom is not freaking out, why should he. Also, Dad probably does not even know Jason went on a field trip today, since Mom is the one who signs the permission slips.

My little trick was to take Elmer’s Glue and smear it on the palm of my hand and let it dry and then gently peel it back leaving it attached or dangling so it looked like my skin was falling off and then run up to my mother and start screaming. I got her good. She screamed and then I got smacked in the head for scaring the crap out of her.

I’ve always said that children, like fine wine, should be kept in a cool, dark place until sufficiently mature. Of course, if that had been applied to me I would, at age 75, still be in that place….

Interesting how the glasses rod that goes off Jason’s ear switches between panels 2 & 3.