Mike du Jour by Mike Lester for November 11, 2018

Or heels.

Well, duh! Of course not! You’d stub your toes kicking your vanquished opponent’s corpse to ascertain his ability to get up and shoot you in the back while you’re doing your victory dance.

try flip flops next

Or anywhere else. Open toed boots wouldn’t work in the stable….

Believe it or not, they do actually exist. (Ewww!)

https://cmgstatesmanaustin.files.wordpress.com/2015/06/cowboy-boot-sandal.jpg?w=640

Never wear them at all, please