I hear you, Patty. Spent far too many years of my young adulthood being the party giver for just that reason. Turns out I was right, but I don’t care now. If people don’t want to invite you to their shindig, why would you want to be around them?
Careful Patty. Was so living this, now I’m done. I realized the “friends” we kept inviting were just using us as a catering service. sigh. After years of always playing host, when we tried to even vaguely broach other venues for the group, each one would protest, “oh, our house is a mess” or “my kitchen is so small,” “we don’t have room,” “I can’t cook like you.”
Yeah, we understand, it takes a lot of effort to clean your house before a party, like we did, cooking in a small kitchen, like we did, eating in the living room, like we did, and just serving food, or even ordering take out, like we did. In other words, taking some effort for friends, just because you want to see them and treat them welcomingly. Supposedly, you don’t have to impress them.
Strange how the when the invitations stopped coming, the “friends” disappeared. A hard sad lesson when our eyes opened. And to deflect the inevitable self-concious excuses, we knew these people: all self-reliant grown ups, no disabilities, plenty of resources, no kids or crazy jobs, time was their own. Obviously, if I was aware of limitations they were forgiven and I’m not talking about those folks. But this was really a whole group of mooches.
I remember inviting my ex-girlfriend and her sister to a Halloween party I was going to throw at my house, and they said that they would come. I said (so excited that they would come), “I think I will come too”, they laughed though not rudely, but I then noticed how stupid I just sounded. Of course, I was going to come to my own party. It would be at my house and I would be the one arranging it.
wjones over 5 years ago
While, don’t forget to invite yourself.
Templo S.U.D. over 5 years ago
sure, Patty, whatever you say
orinoco womble over 5 years ago
I hear you, Patty. Spent far too many years of my young adulthood being the party giver for just that reason. Turns out I was right, but I don’t care now. If people don’t want to invite you to their shindig, why would you want to be around them?
jrankin1959 over 5 years ago
The first lesson: Reciprocity.
Troglodyte over 5 years ago
It’s all about give and take, honey!
prairiedogdance Premium Member over 5 years ago
Careful Patty. Was so living this, now I’m done. I realized the “friends” we kept inviting were just using us as a catering service. sigh. After years of always playing host, when we tried to even vaguely broach other venues for the group, each one would protest, “oh, our house is a mess” or “my kitchen is so small,” “we don’t have room,” “I can’t cook like you.”
Yeah, we understand, it takes a lot of effort to clean your house before a party, like we did, cooking in a small kitchen, like we did, eating in the living room, like we did, and just serving food, or even ordering take out, like we did. In other words, taking some effort for friends, just because you want to see them and treat them welcomingly. Supposedly, you don’t have to impress them.
Strange how the when the invitations stopped coming, the “friends” disappeared. A hard sad lesson when our eyes opened. And to deflect the inevitable self-concious excuses, we knew these people: all self-reliant grown ups, no disabilities, plenty of resources, no kids or crazy jobs, time was their own. Obviously, if I was aware of limitations they were forgiven and I’m not talking about those folks. But this was really a whole group of mooches.
DCBakerEsq over 5 years ago
Life is short. Enjoy it while you can.
the humorist formerly known as Hotshot1984 Premium Member over 5 years ago
I remember inviting my ex-girlfriend and her sister to a Halloween party I was going to throw at my house, and they said that they would come. I said (so excited that they would come), “I think I will come too”, they laughed though not rudely, but I then noticed how stupid I just sounded. Of course, I was going to come to my own party. It would be at my house and I would be the one arranging it.