Off the Mark by Mark Parisi for April 02, 2019

Yikes!

Scroll down for number of cliffs fallen off of and number of truck radiators with your teeth marks.

Now let’s see the number of times you failed to catch the Road Runner.

His smartphone includes the ACME shoping app.

That’s gotta be one sturdy phone which hasn’t a scratch on it.

All in a day’s work.

“Acme. We put rockets on everything.”

I would think surviving explosions would burn more calories

notification sound… “meep meep”

Its a good day when you don’t fall off of a cliff.

Number of fake train tunnels you’ve run into…

As a kid watching this cartoon, there were times I actually felt kind of sorry for Wile E. and wished he’d catch that smart-aleck Roadrunner, just once. Hey, coyote has to eat, too, beep-beep! ;-)

And how many calories has he consumed to offset that?

There’s something to be thankful for chasin’ the roadrunner, look at all the exercise you’re getting.

The “calories burned” are much too low. First, it should read “kilocalories” (kcal), and second, even of these 5020 would be more realistic than 502.