Brewster Rockit by Tim Rickard for February 09, 2011

That’s it, eat the slow ones!

Then what is that in the Girl Scout cookies?

First, Time writes about Tiger Moms, now we have to read about Praying Mantis Moms

But how much will the FDA charge to change the rules - just asking .

So that’s how Soylent Green got its start…. first with the young, then with the old, just like everybody predicted…

Better eat the ones who produce the slow ones too.

Too much cholesterol.

I bet I would have learned calculus quicker if Dad stood over me with a knife and fork.

Is it even possible to fail a grade and have to repeat it these days? Or would that be too damaging to some kid’s self esteem?

Eat the slow ones? My god, there would be no province of Quebec if we did that…

Yeah, but then, we don’t have them 800 at a time either.

That is how “fasting” got it’s name.

How does that song go?

Parents, eat your children well… Feed them on your spleens…

Apologies to Crosby et al

Can’t catch the fast ones…

And the slow ones aren’t tasty.

It doesn’t matter. Slow ones, fast ones. Everything’s better with bacon.

I’ll bet if we did eat the slow ones, they would all start studying a lot harder.

They’re what slow cookers are for.

Perfect, Coyoty!!

If we ate the slow ones, “Jersey Shore” would never have come to be, so that’s one point in the alien’s favor.