Pickles by Brian Crane for February 23, 2011

But you get to hear two stories at once Nelson.

Nelson, when you’re old and wrinkley this stuff will make more sense. Be patient.

Usually, the conversations are a lot more one-sided Because of it, Earl’s become quite good at tuning Opal out. But I’m not sure how Opal got so good at it.

Grog, she’s a woman. It comes naturally.

Too true Yukoner!!! too true!!

I know how to make almond milk. I’ve already made rice milk…which is pretty good on cereal. It can also be used as a substitute for whole milk for babies. Possum milk you can have……..

Then the possum started chasing a squirrel. The one with the black stripe on its back, you know?

it’s the ones with the white stripe that you need to watch!

sounds like my great aunt and uncle. They were both pretty deaf and I believe they actually thought they were responding to one another

Sadly, my wife has me tuned out so much that she will start talking right over me about something completely unrelated. I’ve learned to just keep quiet most of the time. No point getting run over by her train of thought.

Tex, I had the same problem. At some point I just got tired of getting run over. She only has as much power over you as you are willing to give her.

Woman are from Venus…

And then there’s Congress.

I once came across a possum in my back hall. At first, all I saw was the tail, and thought it was a rat. Then I saw its back and I realized that rats aren’t fuzzy. Glad it wasn’t a rat - one that size would have eaten any of my cats.

Tex and Third: This really is much more of an equal opportunity situation.

Ha-ha,they sound like my husband and everyone else he speaks to!

It’s windy today! ‘No, it’s not Wednesday, it’s Thursday!’ I’m thirsty too…let’s go get a beer.